
|
 |
Stepping off the Roller Coaster
The divorce roller coaster includes periods of
euphoria followed by deep lows. Right now, you may be feeling like
an unwilling passenger on a wild ride, but the ride won't last forever.
|
 |
|
|
 |
In the initial stages of divorce, it's hard to
be patient while the world is going about its everyday business as if
nothing has happened. Don't they know you're aching inside? How dare they
show those romantic movies on HBO! Can't those people hold hands and nuzzle
each other somewhere else?
The adjustment period after divorce trauma (whether you are the "leaver"
or the "leavee") is between two and five years, depending somewhat on
the amount of pre-grieving you've experienced. Some people begin the emotional
journey when they realize the marriage is dead -- sometimes well before
they mention the word "divorce" to their spouse.
If you're in the early stages, you're probably wondering what to expect
-- and how to accelerate (or even bypass) the painful stages to reach
the place where you feel whole and happy again. Unfortunately, recovery
from divorce is not an express elevator from the basement of grief to
the penthouse of joy. It's more like a maze: you go forward a bit, become
confused, find the way forward again, hit a wall, retrace your steps,
find a new way forward, realize you took the wrong turn and back-track
again, etc., etc. Like wandering through a hall of mirrors, you confront
yourself -- or what looks like yourself -- around every corner.
| |
 |
|
 |