|
 |
 LOTTERY DOESN'T MEAN HAPPINESS |
|
When I was
a guest on a TV talk show in 1991, I met Dennis, an earnest man who had
just won the lottery. He shared with me his feelings of unhappiness and
anxiety after this supposedly wonderful event brought him a large amount
of money. Dennis had had dozens of business proposals -- and even a few
marriage proposals from women he didn't know! He had become mistrustful:
how could he possibly distinguish between those who were reacting to his
money and those who were responding to him as an individual? This windfall
made Dennis's life a living hell for a while. And even though he was
learning how to deal with his situation, he would never say that for him,
money equaled happiness. In fact, many other lottery winners also report
that the vast change in their financial status has had a very
destabilizing effect on their lives and has created more problems than it
solved.
Here is a final assignment for those of you who feel
affected or controlled by this money myth:
Every day for a week, spend time on activities, old or new, that cost
little or nothing and that bring you happiness.
Notice and record your feelings about each of
these activities. Doing this assignment will help you realize that there
is much in your life (or there could be) that costs little and makes
you happy.
You may also be heartened by the testimony of readers of a magazine
called The Sun, who wrote in on the subject of wealth. It was startling
to see how many of the letters did not equate real wealth, and the feeling
of abundance that comes from deep fulfillment, with financial wealth.
Many of their letters said, in essence, "When I think back on the past
20 years, I realize that my husband [or my wife] and I were happiest
when we were making less money. Our lives were simpler; we were more
creative about doing things we wanted to do; we were less workaholic;
and we had more time and energy to enjoy life and each other. That seemed
like true wealth to us."
In these recessionary times, with so much real financial uncertainty
in the air, freeing yourself from the belief that money equals happiness
can enable you to better roll with the punches. If you are denied a
cost-of-living increase or a raise because of tough financial times
at your job, you will tend to feel less depressed and deprived. Whatever
the financial ups and downs, you'll stand a much better chance of getting
enjoyment out of life.
Money = Love
Every time we turn on our TV, we are bombarded with commercials that
try to link money with love in our minds. They tell us that if we would
just buy this flower-fresh deodorant, or that new and improved shampoo,
or the latest model of that snazzy sports car, we'd have all the love
and happiness we could want. Advertisements in newspapers and magazines
are sending us the same messages. This dangerous cultural conditioning,
and the "keeping up with the Joneses" mentality that fuels it, contributes
to the epidemic of compulsive spending in this country. Many of us believe
not only that money equals love but that money can substitute for a
lack of love.
|
|
|
.gif){kind=small}
