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 PROVIDING FOR FAMILY |
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Take
David, for example. His uncle had gone bankrupt as a result of a bad
business deal and had attempted suicide. This financial tragedy had such a
profound effect on David's dad that he worried all the time about not
having enough money and lectured his children about the evils of frivolous
spending. David grew up to be a lawyer who worked day and night to make
money. He had an intense drive to save more and more money for his
retirement years so he and his wife could live comfortably and still
provide their three kids with a substantial inheritance. David was so
worried about not having enough money that he never wanted to take even
two weeks off at a time for vacations. He missed his daughter's
sixth-grade concert and his son's eighth-grade play because he had to work
both nights "to ensure his family's security," as he put it. He attacked
his wife for buying a new living room couch when the old one was
threadbare, calling this purchase an "unnecessary luxury." At the age of
48, he had the first of two heart attacks. With all this money, David was
not secure. And if he died early, his children, the youngest of whom was
six when the first heart attack struck, would not feel very secure and
safe, even with more than enough money.
Do you believe that
Money = Security?
To see whether this money myth has a grip on
you, ask yourself the following questions:
When you think about not having a lot of money saved for the future,
do you feel very uneasy and insecure?
Do you judge people who spend a lot of money for present pleasures and
short-term goals as being unwise and shortsighted?
When you think about being secure in your old age, is having enough
money the first thing (or the main thing) that comes to mind?
Does putting money away in savings or in other "safe" investments give
you a feeling of inner peace and security more than any other action does?
If you have fears about your old age, does thinking about having more
than enough money during that period comfort you and allay most of your
fears? If you answered yes to three or more of these questions, you
probably believe that money equals security.
Debunking Money =
Security
The trick in debunking this myth is to find a few
examples that serve to contradict it. So I suggest that you identify and
describe, in as much detail as possible, some elderly people you know who:
Don't have a lot of money but seem very secure to you.
Have a lot of money but don't seem at all secure.
What do you think is the difference between these people? What does
one have that the other doesn't that leads to more real security?
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