|
 |
 CONSIDER GETTING HELP IF... |
|
While you
shouldn't wait forever to seek professional help, you should give your
kids six months to a year to get over the divorce -- if their adjustment
problems aren't too severe. Consider seeking outside help if your child
is:
doing uncharacteristically badly in school for three or four months,
even after you've consulted his or her teachers and/or school counselors
losing friends because he or she is acting in an unusually aggressive
manner
showing uncharacteristic, intense anger towards others; this could be
anything from temper tantrums to overreacting in minor situations
developing prolonged mood swings that range from extreme hostility to
extreme affection
showing unrestrained grieving for his or her absent parent and/or for
your former family life
showing other radical changes in behavior, such as continuous problems
in school (truancy or fighting, for example), cheating, lying, stealing,
eating disorders, or alcohol or drug abuse.
If a child
internalizes his or her feelings about the divorce, then it's much more
difficult to know if he or she is having problems coping. In fact, a child
in this situation may not show any outward signs of trouble until years
later. This is more often the case for girls than boys, as Cochrane points
out. "A seven-year-old boy is more likely to act up and give his parents a
hard time than a seven-year-old girl," he says. "Boys tend to act up while
the divorce is under way. Girls tends to be 'peacemakers,' and don't cause
a problem until early adolescence."
1 - Emotional injuries
2 - How children may cope
3 - Warning signs
4 - When to seek help
5 - Consider getting help if...
6 - Coping varies from child to child
|
|
|
.gif){kind=small}
